It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.~Confucius
My knee started hurting on Saturday again....and according to a physical therapist that I asked I shouldn't run for another 2 weeks or so for safety. All I wanted to do is run...but as always, I did too much, to fast and my legs couldn't take it.
I, the poster-child of looking at the sunny side and the glass being half full...I am finally out of answers. For me, all that's left are questions. I don't have any wisdom for this post or any sudden realizations about life.
What am I doing wrong that I can't get better? Why does the entire world seem to be working against me and running? I don't want a lot from life. I don't care about money, or fame, or big houses or fancy cars. All that I really want is to be happy and go running. And for some reason it's the one thing that I can not have.
All that's left for me now is not to give up entirely. I'd be lying if I told you that I think it's all going to be O.K. I realize two weeks doesn't seem that long, but every time I think I'm healed it's always "two more weeks" What I'd like to do is concentrate on biking and swimming for now and train for a triathalon (half-ironman distance)....But I still have a whole year of collegiate running. Meaning that injured or not I have no choice but to be ready to race come September.
Forgetting everything to train for a triathalon, simply because I'm afraid to come back after this injury clearly isn't the answer to these questions.
For now, my goals isn't to get back into running, or to get faster, or to train for the season..or for an ironman for that matter. My only goal, all that's left really, is to not give up on myself and my legs. I can't focus on running, or getting back to it, or getting fast again. All I can focus on is not giving up, because that's all I feel is left for me.
What's next is to wait for my legs to heal and what's left is to hope that my heart can follow them.
