Long Time, No Blog

The horizon is out there somewhere, and you just keep chasing it, looking for it, and working for it" -Bob Dole


It's been far, far too long. I've forgotten how to blog I think! I apologize for the HUGE gap in blogging. Sadly, college has been sucking my time. It seems that there is always an endless amount of Spanish homework, of papers to write. It's rather unfortunate I think that all of my spare time has gone to things that more or less I do not actually enjoy. HOWEVER! As of today I am vowing to set aside at least ONE spare moment per week (hopefully more) for just myself to blog and such. I miss it. I miss ranting on the internet. And really, I  wonder how the virtual world has possibly gotten along without me (hah! kidding on that last one!)

So here are the updates, sad though they may be. My knee is still not better. Unfortunately. Now, I'm not running "badly" per se. I mean, I am still a competitive collegiate athlete. Buuuuut My knee is well...let's face it: still injured. How? I don't freaking know. I dedicate minimally an hour a day to stretching/icing etc. I own not one, not two, but three foamrollers. Who owns three foamrollers? If it's not my knee it's the surrounding muscles, my hips, my calves. My legs are exhausted.

But that's not really even the biggest issue facing me right now. The biggest issue is as always, confidence. Coming off of being injured for almost a year it's so hard for me to go out on a run and not fear hurting myself. It's so hard to think about whether or not my knee hurts every. single. step. It's like my brain is clogged with all this noise and I can't get past it to hear the rhythm of my own breath. What is it? A mental block I think, when combined with the pains in my legs really really inhibits things.

WHY? When I know what the problem is can't I push past it? It's so sad to be running so much slower than I used to. I'm just at a loss of what to do.

It's there. I can see it. I can almost touch it. But when will I be able to reach it?

" Be strong and courageous." -Joshua 1:9