Cross Roads

"Running to him was real, the way he did it the realist thing he knew. It was all joy and woe, hard as diamond; it made him weary beyond comprehension. But it also made him free."
-Once a Runner

 

This is one of those semi-sentimental posts about how much I love running. And how thankful that I am that I get to do it. Hopefully it's not getting too repetitive.

I move back to school this Sunday. I guess I'm a little anxious as most students are. But I'm double anxious for cross country. I mean, I've been hurt off and on (but mostly on) ever since Nationals last cross country season. Right now my biggest worry is getting hurt again. I've put a lot of work in with physical therapy this summer and I don't want that to go to waste.

However, on that note: I can't thank my physical therapist enough for everything that he did for me this summer. When I walked into his clinic 3 months ago and begged to use his Alter-G just so that I could run again I didn't think that I would be able to run normally for months. On day one he asked me how many miles a week I minimally needed to be up to in order to feel prepared for the season. I said 40. By Saturday I will be at 42 miles, 47 miles of biking and 1 hour of swimming and 1 Pilates class this week.

This morning I ran alone. No music. No civilization. On the outskirts of my town there's a park with a few miles of trails that I like to run at. And just because I was feeling great I ran the last 10 minutes completely barefoot.  I ran for an hour and 2 minutes. I could have run for 2 hours. Or maybe forever.

Somehow my knees and IT bands are miraculously better. Maybe. Just maybe this is the end. Maybe just maybe I'll be back to where I was at the end of last cross country season.

Though, I will admit that these worries completely disappear the second I start running. So now here I am at a cross roads of sort between being injured and being able to move on. Yes, I'm worried that I won't be able to get past it. I don't want to spend the entire season worried about getting injured. I have to learn now, to trust myself, to trust my legs, and to trust in that love of running.