Yup. My extensive knowledge of psychology has enabled me to diagnose my excessive fear of falling off my new bicycle. Don't believe me? It is indeed a real disorder.
Read this ---> http://www.changethatsrightnow.com/cyclophobia/symptoms/
So. What exactly am I afraid of? First and foremost I'm afraid of falling off of my bicycle. Fear of going uphill {because it hurts my quads} fear of going downhill {too fast!} Fear of a bug flying into my throat/eyes/ears/nose while biking. Fear of extreme chafing due to biking. Fear of getting hit by a car while biking. You get the idea. Maybe underlying it all is the more I bike the more the reality hits that I can't run. Fear of never getting to run again.
I've spent this whole past week learning about riding my bike. Riding a road bike is quite a bit different than going out for a ride. It's much more intense. Or at least...I feel it should be.
The first day I did two bike rides at 9-10 miles each. On a flat bike trail {for safety in case of falling off!!!}. The second day I went biking with my mom. This was probably not the best decision. Seeing as how I'm an inexperienced biker a great majority of the ride was characterized by my mom telling me things and me not wanting to listen {not because she doesn't know what she's talking about but because she's my mom and I'm stubborn}.
I've ridden the same route the past two days now. I combined my favorite running loops and then I hit up the good old {SAFE!} bike trail for the last few miles. This is one thing that I've really come to like about biking. With running you have to be careful of your miles. Always making sure you don't do too many. But with biking I can just pick it up and be up to a bunch of miles a pop within a week. I also like the feeling of going really fast. Let's be honest, you may feel fast when you run but to passing motorists, or people watching you're not really moving that quickly. Even if you are a slow biker {ahem} you are still moving pretty fast. On the flip side the faster I go the more intensely I fear falling off.
I hate biking on a busy road. I'm not 100% sure that I will be able to adequately get myself and my bicycle to safety in the incidence of a rogue car. I suppose I could always ride it into the ditch but I'd rather not do that. I always thought that motorists were particularly rude to runners and was always somewhat offended when they blew past me. I've found that this is NOTHING when compared to how horribly they treat bikers.
I also hate biking into the wind. If you have never experienced it, it is the most strenuous thing I have ever felt in my life. I equate it to either 1. Running consistently uphill for 10 miles or 2. Swimming against a current. This morning I went into the wind for over half of my ride. Note: yelling at/cursing at/growling at the wind does NOT make it die down. {It was worth a shot}
Biking is however, a good analogy for life. And I enjoy its applicability to every day. Alot of times it seems like no matter what you do, where you turn you are always battling a strong headwind. Sometimes it seems like the whole dang world is uphill. But eventually the wind calms and there's always a downhill that follows an up.
Enough philosophizing for one day.
7 days until I can try running again.
"Your fears are not walls, but hurdles. Courage is not the absence of fear, but the conquering of it."
-Dan Millman
-Dan Millman
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