Apathy

"It's not what you are that holds you back, it's what you think you are not." - Denis Waitley

This week, if you didn't already know. Is was a really, really, big week for every college student across America: Finals Week. As it's been said the 99% of your grade is based upon 1% of the semester. Usually for me, this means studying a minimum of 5 hours per exam, putting off everything else in favor of studying, and then being mad if I don't find them difficult enough for the amount of work I put in to studying. However, as with so much else, this year is different.

Instead of being the most studious person on the planet I find myself struggling for motivation, and not caring so much about the outcome. It's harder to stay off of facebook and I'd honestly rather clean my room than study. I don't know what's gotten in to me or where my motivation's gone. I'll probably power my way through my last two exams tomorrow fueled by an inappropriate amount of coffee. Unfortunately judging by how nervous I was about exams, I probably won't even be excited when they're over either. I wish I could get some sort of emotion squeezed in there.

Just because running is gone doesn't mean I shouldn't care about the rest of life right? But is it true? Does this happen to all athletes when they're injured...or maybe even does it happen to all people when they're injured. I'm not sure. All I know is that "normal" Katie should be spending 5-7 hours making up and answering possible essay questions and re-reading my textbooks for the upteenth time and sharpening her pencils. Yet...I haven't even started yet..

I hate that not running has that big of an impact on my life and motivation. But yet, it does.

All that said, my doctor appointment is tomorrow. I'm hoping to be crutch-free but I'm not exactly holding my breath. This also may be why I'm so distracted. Four exams in 3 days is enough. Four exams in three days plus finding out the fate of my foot is really too much.